Kitty Ussher. She'd been living in a house for five years, but within 12 months of being elected she was onto the Commons authorities for a major refurbishment.
Artex ceilings??!!!! They had to go. They had "three dimensional swirls" - aren't they the worst???!!! "This counts for 'dilapidations' in my book" she wrote.
And "strange plumbing"?!! Who could live with that??!!!! I mean, there were "pipes that are not used" for goodness sake!
As the previous owners of the house had “reduced the size of the arch between the ground floor front and back rooms,” Miss Ussher asked whether this could be restored to its original state.
She went on: “Generally, there are gaps in terms of our furniture, white goods etc. And some of the windows require curtains and/blinds. I am presuming that if I just go to John Lewis and purchase non-antiques that this will be acceptable.”
Oh yes, why don't you darling? Just pop down to John Lewis and sort it out.