Tuesday, June 30, 2009

EXCLUSIVE - Prime Minister resigns - new government taking shape


After 137 years as Prime Minister, Mr William Gladstone has finally called it a day and handed in his resignation to King David (of the Penhaligon - just in case you were wondering when he would crop up).

His Majesty has graciously offered Mr Gladstone the post of Minister for relations with remote Hellenic Islands and certain oft-visited parts of Soho, a post which Mr Gladstone has gratefully accepted.

His Majesty this afternoon requested the presence of Dame Shirley Williams at Buckingham Palace and duly offered his hand to Dame Shirley. Having kissed the proffered royal extremity, Dame Shirley is now in 10 Downing Street devising her new cabinet.

Mr Churchill has asked for a release from his onerous duties to spend more time building his wall. He made clear this resignation was nothing (much) to do with India.

Dame Shirley has already asked Nancy Seear to take up the post of Deputy Prime Minister - a move seen, by seasoned observers, more as "cock-up" rather than "conspiracy".

News of other cabinet positions will follow, but we already hear that Vince Cable's new duties may include something exciting to do with the very urgent subject of bees. Two Earls Conrad are tipped for jobs and there has even been talk of Sir James Graham, the 2nd Baronet, returning to the government. It goes without saying that rising stars Jo Swinson and Baroness (Emma) Nicholson are likely to be given key roles.

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