Oh dear. Oh dearie dearie me.
Last night's Newsnight contained quite a spectacle.
Michael Crick was on the case of the Scottish non-budget with his usual terrier-like determination, charging round the Scottish parliament with his microphone to prick the pomposity of Messrs Salmond and Swinney.
What saddened me greatly (and I had to get a box of Kleenex out) was to see poor old Alex Salmond being forced to comment as he waited impatiently for the doors of his lift to close. "It's a bad day for Scotland" he was forced to declaim, through pursed lips.
Poor, poor Alex Salmond!
I thought it was particularly hilarious that Salmond blamed those who voted against the budget for jeopardising Scotland's public services.
Nothing to do with him then - throwing together last minute changes to the budget by the seat of his pants to try and squeeze it through.
Of course not.
Would it be totally un-called for to mention that Alex Salmond was once described, by a fellow Scot, as "a man who is so pleased with himself, he'd drink his own bathwater"? (And that's the clean version).