An almighty big fat penny has finally dropped in Brownland, causing a huge fat resonating CLUUNNNNNNKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!
My flabber is well and truly gasted and I my hoop is a-cock. Gordon Brown is in serious danger of giving politics a good reputation.
The controversial second home allowance for MPs could be axed within days now Prime Minister Gordon Brown has demanded an urgent Commons vote on reforms.
In a bid to calm a growing storm over taxpayer-funded Westminster perks, he pre-empted a summit with other party leaders and an independent inquiry by calling for a vote as early as next week.
Mr Brown set out his proposals to make the system "simpler and less generous" in a video posted on the Number 10 website shortly before they were formally published for MPs by Commons leader Harriet Harman.
He said it was vital to take immediate action to restore confidence that MPs were there to "serve the public and not there to serve themselves" and warned MPs they needed to show "humility".
Under his proposals, the second homes allowance would be replaced by an independently-set flat rate daily allowance based on attendance.
HALLEJUJAH! (Post-script critical faculty alert: This could give MPs who turn up, sign and slop off each day more money than currently and it is much the same as the rather discredited model in the European Parliament).
Ministers who live in grace and favour homes and MPs living "within travelling distance" of Westminster would be banned from claiming it, though there will still be an allowance for London MPs.
Receipts would be required for every item claimed by MPs, however small, under the terms of the interim reforms - which could be in place by July 1.
Receipts for every item?! Crikey! Hallejujah!
There would also be "greater transparency" of earnings from MPs' second jobs, said Mr Brown - who wrote to Tory leader David Cameron and Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg offering to meet to discuss the proposals in the next week.
Under the proposals, all staff appointed by MPs would become direct employees of the House of Commons which would set their employment terms and pay.This measure is designed to address concerns over the employment of MPs' relatives.
Oh my sainted aunt! I can't take this! My cup runneth over! Hallejujah!