The Mail on Sunday. "David Owen, Ming's top men, even Mandy - all are welcome in Dave's big tent".
"David Owen"? Pass the oxygen, I am going to expire through hyperventilatory laughter!
"Mandy"? Here is my last will and testament. I may die of laughter shortly.
Last autumn, George Osborne, the shadow chancellor, invited himself into the office of a leading figure in the LibDem Party. Then, without so much as a preamble, he got down to business and presented him with a dramatic proposition, which he made clear had been sanctioned by David Cameron.
Osborne suggested to David Laws, LibDem work and pensions spokesman, that he should consider defecting to the Conservative Party. In return, he would be offered a shadow cabinet job. At this point, Laws politely and thoughtfully explained that he was not a Tory.
What? Little Georgie Osbourne?! "Without preamble"! Did his feet touch the ground as he pulled himself up to his full height in the chair? Oh, go on then, here's another gratuitous laughter photo.